Life, Love & Math

Sometimes I wish I lived in a world where mathematics was the universal language. Life would most definitely make more sense to me. Love would make more sense and I think I would have it so much easier in this world. Every single problem would have a soultion that can be easily found by calculations.

Rules would be so easy to understand and codes would be so easier to crack. I know this might not make sense but I already know how this world would be like.

In this world people would walk around with square root signs on top of their heads, kinda like halos. These signs would only disappear once the two that are meant to be together find each other. That way no one would waist time with someone that is not meant to be there forever and end up broken when they meet the person they are meant to be with.

In this world my factorial of zero ( my 1/the 1) would understand that I am a human with flaws like any other and still accept me for who I am because that is who she fell (will fall) in love with. Then I can be the man she needs and be her factorial of 1 (also 1). Then we would simply form a union by simple addition or come together to form the factorial of 2 ( =2). Once that is done we would be on a straight line leading to infinity like y=mx+c.

In this world conflict would be solved by finding solutions to mathematical problems. Surely that way there would be less drama in the world.

Life would really be easy if the key to life was easily found in a differential.

A brother can only dream.

The Square Root of Three by David Feinberg

 

I fear that I will always be,
A lonely number like root three,
The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine,
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
With just some quick arithmetic
I know I’ll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,
Another square root of a three,
Has quietly come waltzing by,
Together now we multiply
And form a number we prefer,
Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds,
And with the wave of magic wands,
Our square root signs become unglued
And love for me has been renewed

A Letter To The Brain

"Anga, next door... gone" This is how the news of your death reached me. 09/09/10.

Let's rewind a bit. 2000 the okes were all worried because you kept disappearing and we hardly ever saw you so I took it upon myself to find out how you had been spending your afternoons. Being the person you are, you didn't tell me, you showed me. Turned out that you had been going to the library to read books. So I was like "hey let me see what it is you love about these books". We started reading "the Adventures of Asterix". That is when I fell in love with reading and comics. Over the years I have read a lot of books and I seriously doubt I would have if it wasn't for you. Since your death I haven't finished a single book. I just can't bring myself to finish it. I guess my mind has had a mental block when it comes to books and my studies since then.

Let's go back to 2010. In April I left UCT halfway through a Chemistry and Physiology degree. Exactly a week after that I found out that my aunt had passed away. The following week I was in Queenstown for the funeral. I told you about everything that been going and you lit up a jay and said "kuzolonga X bhoza yam". 

Fast forward to the 9th Of September that year. When the news of your death reached me I couldn't believe it. Felt like God was just toying with me. Why was it all happening that year? Why did you, someone that was like a brother to me pass away?

The day before your funeral me and Zolani were drinking and sharing stories about you and all that did was just make us both really sad. We drank so much that night and I got home around 3. At 6 I was up tryna nurse a hangover and coming to terms with the fact that we were laying you to rest that day. As I get to your house your aunt tells me i have to speak at your funeral. Now you know how I am with speaking in public.  When I saw you lying in that coffin my heart sank. Man I didn't know how to deal with that. I just couldn't believe it. Moms comes up up to me and says "kuzolunga mntanam".

I listened to people speak about you and it was great knowing that you had touched so many people just by being yourself. My name came up and I had to tell all these people what you meant to us as your friends. I was shaking and stuttering like you used to do. My last words were "ngendi ngenguye lomntu ndinguye ukuba uAnga wayengekho (I wouldn't be who I am if it wasn't for Anga)" and I meant every single word.

Fast forward to this year. Shit really hit the fan so I ran home. When I got home all I wanted was to see my mom, Zolani, Zanele, Lakhe and you. Have a jay and have a few drinks with you and the okes. This made me realise that I never dealt with your death. You know I have never been able to deal with these things. I drink way more than I used to and I smoke now. The drinking sometimes doesn't help and I fight with people. I know you wouldn't be proud because the only thing you endorsed was the jay. 2 months ago while I was getting robbed with my mates In Bishop Lavis, a part of me just wanted those okes to just shoot me then something made me snap out of that thought.

 If its true what they say about people watching over us then your probably knew every single word I would write.It's been 3 years buddy. I need to let go but I will never forget the role you played in my life. You were always like a big bro even though I was born 26 days before you.

RIP to the greatest stoner to ever live.

RIP Anga "Ta Brainz weziway" Kese

Dyer or De Guzman? Who was selfish?

Hat trick for what? For who? Nha son!

The funniest thing I watched this past weekend was De Guzman's selfishness and how the media made it look like Dyer was completely wrong to be angry at De Guzman.

Now before we get into why I think Dyer had every reason to be angry, lets go back to a somewhat similar incident that happened earlier this year....

In Demba Ba's debut game for Chelsea he netted 2 goals against Southampton. He could have gone on to get 3 had Lampard decided to let him take the penalty. Now Ba didn't argue with Lampard even though he knew how great it would be to get 3 on his debut. Good team player? Yes. Lampard could have easily let Ba take the penalty because I am sure he knows how great it would have been for Ba to get 3 on his debut. Lampard is the same player that almost denied Drogba the chance to win the EPL's golden boot by refusing to let drogba take a penalty. Good team player? Nha. Lampard is just keen on breaking records.

Now let's get back to Dyer and De Guzman's case...

Dyer scored 2 of the 1st 3 goal in Sunday's Capital One Cup Final at Wembley and could have easily gotten his 3rd had De Guzman not been selfish. This is a very different case from the one above. Dyer was on his way to being the 1st player to score a hat-trick in a League Cup final EVER!!!! Show me a player that wouldn't want to be the 1st to do that and I'll bring back Torres from the dead.

This was Dyer's 1st ever crack at a stage that big. He has never been called up for the English national team and has spent much of the season warming the bench. De Guzman had no business taking the penalty because he isn't Swansea's regular spot kick taker. In fact, they don't have a regular penalty taker. So now isn't De guzman the selfish one for denying Dyer a chance to be a League Cup great? Surely letting Dyer take the penalty would have been better for the team. 

A league cup hat-trick would have surely gotten Dyer a call up to the English squad. Now all of that doesn't look like it will happen all because De Guzman just wouldn't let him be great. I highly doubt that Dyer will ever get another crack at playing a final in Wembley. Oh well...

Pep to take Bayern to new heights?

I'm coming for you.

AH! This is something I haven't done in a while. Everyone that knows me knows that I love football and everything (well except the racism) that comes with it. One of the things I love the most is the transfer window as this builds expectations for a new season.




Players I think will leave Bayern.

Mail Online reported that Pep Guardiola wants Bale at bayern next season. Bale is also linked with Real  Madrid but Real is a mess right now and I don't see Bale choosing Mou (or whoever succeeds him) over Pep. Yes I know that Real and Spurs have that deal they made but the player has to agree to any deal made. They also wrote that Pep will be handed a 100 million pounds to build the team he wants. Anyone that has taken note of the window in recent years will know that a lot can be done with that amount. Europe can be conquared with that amount. Should he get Bale and Suarez, the likes of Gomez and Ribery (both great players) would have to make way. Gomez found the back of the net 80 times in the last 2 seasons for Bayern but Pep has is the same coach the let Deco, Ronaldinho, Ibrahimovic & Eto'd go. For that alone I'm sure that only a few players are safe from getting sacked come the next transfer window. I'm expecting Pep to let go of at least 3 players that are currently in the team and go for 3 Barcelona players. Robben is also likely to be let go.


Safe? I think so.

Now should Pep get Suarez, Gomez would be Ibrahimovic no.2. Now these are obviously my opinions on what I think will happen but anyone that has watched Pep will know that Bayern will not have a quiet summer (winter for us folks in the Southern hemisphere) and more than one top player will leave Bayern. Also Pep's reputation in the football world will surely attract some of the best players to the Bundesliga. I just hope that Dortmund builds a team that can compete with Pep's Bayern. Klopp vs Pep should be one interesting fixture. The transfer window and I have missed Pep.I'm looking forward to what i think will be one of the most exciting transfer windows of the century.